Reader, writer, thinker, and nerd about all things pop culture and feminism.

"I had a random stranger shout at me from across the street "Oi bignose, you've got a massive nose." Like, yeah, I've noticed bruh. Why did you need to point it out? Do you feel more powerful now?" — spaceandthewoods_

"I have never been so disgusted at the way they all talked and laughed at her. I couldn't believe that he would genuinely use her like that. He talked about her with such genuine hatred, but still used her to get off. It was absolutely dehumanizing. I have never been so mad. I went off on all of them, and it was the biggest fight I had ever had with my boyfriend at that point. I will never forget how easy it was for them to objectify her like that. That memory stays with me." — Unusual_Form3267

"I relate to this so much. I still vividly remember how awful it felt when I was out at a bar with two basically model-esque co-workers. I’m pretty average looking and I was overweight at the time. It was like I literally did not exist. One guy actually wedged in between me and one of my coworkers and essentially shoved me out of the way just to talk to her. I felt so humiliated and literally invisible.

I’ve lost a decent amount of weight and while men aren’t constantly hitting on me or anything, I definitely have noticed a difference in people actually acknowledging I exist in a space lmao." — ofmiceandmo

"And even when the teacher or professor assigns lab partners, I’ve had to deal with guys being depressed and/or seemingly embarrassed and completely uninterested in doing the task/project with me. Lots of them couldn’t even look me in the eye. It was rough. Like I’m sure they weren’t doing it on purpose to be difficult or hurt me, I never got mad about it, but boy the psychic damage it caused me when I was younger was wild." — antijess

"It's always difficult being around a friend who is treated completely differently. When I was a pre-teen I had a bad haircut my mom made me get, acne, gained some weight. My best friend was cute but not extraordinarily pretty or anything. She was always treated like she was the pretty one, the feminine one. The one guys wanted and girls wanted to be friends with. While I was treated like one of the guys. That really messed up my self esteem.

As adults the reverse is true. I had a glow up and she had a glow down. But yet I still carry the pain of my youth. She's still way more socially confident than me." — catsarehere77

"I didn’t realize this about myself until COVID. With a mask on, suddenly I got lots of attention and lingering looks from the opposite gender (a first for me). I chose to think this means I have nice eyes, though that choice is harder to make some days." — skinnyawkwardgirl

"All on top of still having the usual social awkwardness and fumbling from my childhood. I thought people were just mean to each other as a general rule growing up. Then I learned that no, I just hadn't registered as a person person to them. Because I'd been ugly. It shattered me as an older teen/early twenty something. I realised love in all its forms was so much more conditional than I'd feared. I've never quite looked at people the same way, and my disordered eating now manifests as a binge/restrict cycle so I get to see it play out over and over again. Disappear, reappear, disappear, reappear. Get ignored and shunned and looked at with disgust, get creeped on and preyed on until you want to claw your own skin off. Rinse and repeat." — Badlifedecision2402

"I do regularly get complimented on my commitment to do my hair and make up nice every day regardless of what's happening or what time it is. Little do they know, I get even uglier without it.

I had one guy genuinely ask me out, which was quickly crushed by my brother when he told me "Let's be for real, have YOU SEEN the girls he goes out with? He's after your money." Not only do you see yourself as unattractive, but people close to you find it hard to believe when someone else might.

I work around pretty girls and men every day. The men fawn over them, regularly make excuses to talk to them or do tasks for them, their tone and willingness to help immediately change. Meanwhile, I've worked with some for years and they still can't remember my name.

I can say not ALL men are like this and there are genuine good ones that are nice to any female, even if they don't want to date them or find them attractive." — spoookyspooon

Responses have been edited for length and clarity.