“The husband found out that the wife was going to get his house, so he burned it down and then faxed her the transfer of ownership forms.”

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"Eventually, the judge decided to go along with what the parents wanted and said, 'Well, since neither of you wants your kids, I'll take the boy.' He then asked the stenographer if she wanted the girl (the poor woman was horrified and refused), but the court clerk, who knew the judge well, intervened and declared she would take in the girl. It made the parents realize they were being dumb and that they did not actually want to lose their children. After a half-hour recess, they had a full custody agreement. The judge was pretty proud of his little ruse, but those poor kids."

"I kept telling the guy people would find out anyway, and there'd be nothing we could do to stop her from reneging on her promise not to out him. He came out to his parents, but no one else. Then, despite my very vocal protests, he agreed to about 90% of what they initially asked for. It was stuff that a judge would never order given the facts."

"I said, 'Hey bud, that is unwise.' See, if you treat your business like a personal asset, the court will conclude it should be treated like a personal asset, meaning it should be shared 50/50. My client disagreed with this. He felt it was important to show the court how well his business was doing. As it turns out, the judge DID think it was important, and the wife essentially got a 50% share of the business's profits. Book-learnin' folks call this 'hubris.'"

"The judge's staff and opposing counsel walked in to make sure she hadn't knocked me against the wall. The case had been going on for over a year at that point, and she still hadn't considered that she would need to be self-sufficient. It was the hardest case I've ever had because I just couldn't relate to my client in any way. Feminism completely missed her, and having it hit you in the face in your 40s must be rough."

Note: Responses have been edited for length/clarity.