“I had to present an estimate to both the homeowner and a life-size mannequin that she had seated at the table that she told me to address as ”Marie.”

As a Writer at BuzzFeed, I write and curate quizzes, listicles, and articles about everything from pop culture and history to food and fashion.

I also grabbed responses from threads 1 and 2. 

"Everything's cool. Then a chicken walks out of the back room. The chicken is wearing a red baseball jersey and a red baseball cap. Then another chicken appears in a pink dress. And another one in a brown sweater. They walk over to the drag guy, and he casually pets one as he's talking to me. The princess chicken craps on his floor, and he cleans it up with a paper towel. No big deal. Just a very friendly, likeable guy who is very serious about dressing as a woman and his costumed poultry." 

"If you have never seen one, it is a doll that stands against the wall with its hands up to its face (and even more creepy usually they have no face) but they look like a kid hiding their face or pouting after being put in a time out. When I say they were in every room, I mean EVERY SINGLE ROOM. And not just one, but dozens, lining the walls. Not laying down, but standing up against every wall of the house. The houses electricity had been shut off so all we had was flashlights. He is already afraid of dolls and this made it so much worse. All together we counted 63, but there might have been more." 

"After about 45 minutes, I was wrapping up that set up bifold doors and he goes, "I’ve been sitting here for the last 30 minutes and you don’t say A WORD! Aren’t you wondering why a man is sitting here practically naked watching you work?" 

I go, "Oh sorry, didn’t even realize you were there." He hated that lol. He said, "what would you say to me if I wanted to SUCK… YOUR… DICK…" 

I said, "I would say ‘no thanks’." And just walked away.

His boy toy heard this interaction and had a word with him. He didn’t say anything else to me, but continued to follow me around the rest of the morning while I finished my work. Halfway through finishing I realized my Gatorade went missing, only to reappear right where I left it.

They asked, "Are you going to drink your Gatorade?" I said, "Uh… no thanks. I lost track of it a while back and not sure if one of you drank from it." They continued to ask me to stay and drink margaritas and smoke weed, but I just collected my check and left. Turns out the dude was a retired cop so he definitely had weapons and restraints in the house. I just took my money to the bank and never heard from him again lol." 

"Also completely beyond me why they wouldn't clean that shit up after the fire if for no other reason than insurance adjusters being able to blame them (rightly) and possibly not pay out. "How did the fire start?" I asked. (required to ask) "No idea," the husband replied."