“Maybe this was all caused by Big Bidet™️…”

I like to write about spooky stuff, including *EEK* politics.

"I’m a 32-year-old female living in central Texas, and I just tested positive for the Cyclospora cayetanensis parasite. It’s all over the news and now also in my belly. Been about a month with my new besties, ask me anything."

A: Symptoms are unlike regular diarrhea. It actually has not been as bad as the news makes it sound, just inconvenient.

It started with a bit of an upset stomach, but nothing unusual. I was traveling at the time, so I thought maybe I just drank a little too much the night before. Then felt like I had to poop, and it was legitimately straight liquid. I have never experienced a sensation like that — basically peeing out of my butt.

There has been very little pain, cramping, or discomfort. I just can’t trust farts right now. And if I feel like I have to go, it’s pretty urgent. The biggest issue was actually getting a stool sample because I was so cleaned out.

It’s been about a month since symptoms started, and this past week all my poops were normal without any meds. :) Feeling so much better.

A: When you break it down, a month starts to make more sense.

I was traveling for a bachelorette trip. I was able to write off about a week of the diarrhea as travel tummy. Then I also came down with a really bad cold. So I thought, "Oh, maybe the flu." That was another week.

I lived on bland food and liquids for weeks, thinking I was kicking a stomach bug. It was around week three when the rest of the symptoms went away that I thought I needed to see the doctor. The only problem was that by that point, I was eating so little solid food that I couldn’t produce a viable stool sample for days.

When I finally did, the freaking lab was closed for the Fourth of July. So I had to wait almost another week after that before I could poop again. Now that it’s all said and done, it’s been a month since symptoms started, and I finally got the results back.

A: I avoided it instinctually because I didn’t want to “cover up” symptoms if something was actually wrong, if that makes sense. And I thought it was the flu at first, so I figured it would pass on its own. So it was just lucky I didn’t because when I looked into it later, they say don’t take any anti-diarrheal because it can basically trap the little buggers in your bowel.

A: I haven’t actually started meds yet, since I JUST got the test back today. Luckily, my poops have mostly started to normalize without meds so far, but I will still take them to make sure they’re fully eradicated. Looks like I got Bactrim.

A: I have a suspicion I got it from bagged lettuce used at a private hibachi when I was on a trip a few weeks back. The symptoms lined up perfectly with it, and it just makes sense based on the rest of my diet.

I will be okay! The craziest part of the whole ordeal is that I’m literally not in pain. There is very little cramping or regular diarrhea pain; I just feel like I have to go, and it’s very urgent. I CANNOT trust farts right now.

A: Others had upset stomachs, but no one else got the parasites as far as I’m aware. So my theory kinda falls apart at that point. The thing is, I have no clue where else it would’ve come from because I don’t eat bagged produce or much raw veggies. They’re saying berries could be a problem, though.

A: They say 2–10 days, but I couldn’t pinpoint what before that would have infected me. Not that it’s not possible, I just don’t remember.

A: 100000%. It is pure liquid and forceful.

A: They can test the liquid, but by the time I was supposed to do it, I physically couldn’t poop anymore. Liquid or otherwise, partly because I was on almost a full liquid diet by that point. There was just not much left in there to make anything.

A: For me, it’s been Pedialyte, chicken broth/bone broth, crackers, and toast if I can handle them. As of now, I’m getting back to solids, which has helped the movement down there.

A: I’ve had diarrhea many times in my life. It’s always soft, even runny. But this thing, I cannot overstate, it’s pure liquid. Like, almost no solid matter is coming out.

A: I’ve had norovirus, and I would choose the parasites 100 times over that. When I had norovirus, the cramping and stomach pain were agony. It was coming out of both ends, and I couldn’t leave the toilet. The parasite symptoms for me were jarring at first, but way milder. I never had any pain or real discomfort.

A: I missed about a week or so of work because I had a horrible cold at the same time this was all happening. So I originally wrote it off as the flu. Luckily, other than that, it hasn’t disrupted my life much.

A: I turn to the side, and I disappear basically. 💅🏻

A: What should I name them? I was kinda thinking Bonnie and Clyde.

A: As long as it doesn’t become a podcast host or a zombie tradwife, I’m cool with whatever.

R: Maybe this was all caused by Big Bidet™️…

R: If it makes you feel better, I think I got it in Florida. I blame Florida for everything.

C: LOL — is this AMA going to have to pause every 10 minutes?

R: I wish the tears were coming out of my eyes and not my butt (but thank you).

Note: Comments have been edited for clarity.