The ladies of the internet never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit.

Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up their hilarious musings. Scroll through this week’s great tweets, threads and other posts from women, and then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.

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been on my last straw for bout 300 straws now

Somebody said that World Cup is just the US having a giant sleepover with the cousins we never see because our parents hate each other. 😂

I used to be confused about the Madonna-Whore complex when I first heard about it as a kid because I was like well isn’t Madonna kind of slutty too

Shout out to the man who asked if I needed help getting my suitcase off the train yesterday and when I told him no thank you he started singing independent woman by destinys child

I am literally never drinking again until around maybe Friday at 7pm

I am BEGGING hotels to start putting real doors on bathrooms again

I get rlly frightened when the washing machine gets to the scary part

gay guy in my beach carpool just referred to chappel roan’s Hot to Go as “the she/they YMCA”

Guys that work at weed dispensaries are like “No bro I swear it’s not gonna feel like you’ve been wrapped with bandages and locked in a sarcophagus for 2 thousand years” meanwhile the strain is named The Mummy’s Curse Comes True

Whoever named it "Parmesan cheese" and not "spaghetti confetti" missed a great opportunity.

i can be the uk pm i have time between july and october

i think i'd get kicked off love island for trying to make the guys kiss too many times

At the mall urgently trying to find the Pottery Barn bc the Uber is waiting for us there. Friend shouts at me “you’re a white woman! You should know where the pottery barn is” and I swear to god an older white lady stepped out of the shadows behind us and said “follow me”

panicked spelling out an insurance code on the phone and said “u as in… useless” and when the receptionist read it back to me she chose umbrella. that works too

To those asking me if they should watch love island: this shit isn’t for the weak. It’s an hour every day for 6 weeks. It’s a commitment, a marathon, and ur gonna wonder why ur watching this shit but keep at it u will see levels of psychological torture never before seen

“he’s using u for ur body” do u think i went to his place at 3am to discuss the economical and political state of the world?

telling your parent that a video is AI feels like telling a child santa doesn’t exist

having a wide upper body IS feminine, they’re called broad shoulders for a reason

pic.twitter.com/pYTrLXwBei

a guy texted me once that his friend was just in a fatal car accident & i was like omg i’m so sorry do u want to talk abt it & he was like yeah he’s gonna be okay but he’s in the hospital & i had to explain to a grown man what the word fatal means

happy father’s day! one time my therapist told my dad i needed more positive validation from him so he just texted me “Validation” in the middle of the day https://t.co/0pYpEthlAh pic.twitter.com/nAHhZR3ZNv

music journalism is so cooked your choices are either eat chicken with a british woman or eat chicken with a bald man

Just got home from a 12 hour first date. This is about to be the best two weeks of my life

there's good mac n cheese, there's bad mac n cheese, and then there's kraft mac n cheese which is simultaneously both and neither

when i email americans i always put more exclamation points, out of respect for their culture

Bras be like “hi I’m the exact same bra but in a different color and I fit completely different”

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

i love the word tchotchke. like yessss give me a word with some texture

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