“It really left a bad taste in my mouth, how I feel like they just EXPECT me to do it as if it’s the easiest thing to do.”

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"I'm a bit wary of the risks of a kidney transplant, so I was hoping the whole time that I wouldn't be compatible."

"He joined our family while I was in high school and took me in like his own. When he married my mom, he told me that he'll take care of my tuition and other living costs for me."

"At the same time, I was also hoping another donor would come in to help out. Alas, literally the next day, the whole family was texting me and giving me their thanks already."

"The problem is that my mom and other family members went absolutely ballistic. They called me all sorts of names, and said that if it weren't for my step-dad, we would've been out on the streets."

"While they don't have that same pressure put upon them, as they're all incompatible. Anyway, I might still go back on my decision as I do have the time, but right now I'm just not sure. Am I the asshole?"

"Not the asshole. Donating a kidney is a HUGE ask. But what you should have done is tell the doctor performing the test that you had reservations," ButterscotchLittle65 said. "He would then tell everyone that you were not a match, no matter the results."

"If you want to take the path of least resistance, tell your family you changed your mind, you'll do it, and then when you get to the clinic, tell them you're being pressured. They'll disqualify you and come up with a plausible medical reason why you can't donate."

"Not the asshole. But you should take some time to process whether the decision is genuinely because of your worries about the operation or if it's because your mother broke your trust, which is shitty," ACNHenthusiast22 said. "Don't get me wrong, she's mad crappy for that. But it seems like you might have made the decision because of that."

"You should have known better than to tell your mom," FormerlyDK said. "Especially since she wasn’t exactly unbiased. It’s her husband, after all."