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The Funniest Tweets From Women This Week
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The ladies of the internet never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up their hilarious musings. Scroll through this week’s great tweets, threads and other posts from women, and then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups. Sign up for our Funniest Tweets of the Week newsletter here. “when did your anxiety start?” in elementary school when i’d count paragraphs ahead to see which one i might have to read out loud Why doesn’t 50 Cent just go on tour with Nickelback and call the tour “45 Cents” my god do I have to think of everything? good morning today i hugged a TSA agent because i misread a gesture he made to guide me through the body scanner mom texts me like im her affair partner pic.twitter.com/n96oj1PBFT the AUDACITY of my body to be tired after i gave it 8 hours of sleep. like bro i gave you everything. you’re on Very thick ice with me . i love you I love spring in the city I love putting away my Big Coat then pulling it back out then putting it away then pulling it back out then putting it away then i never beg except when it’s to differ my boyfriend when i was 19 was so beautiful they paid him to walk around Abercrombie and pretend to fold clothes. He got bored and asked “can i actually fold clothes” and they said no. i would like to personally thank whoever gingered the first ale Costco should have an Awareness of My Surroundings test before approving memberships absolutely losing it over what aritzia thinks you can “wear to work” pic.twitter.com/0sbaxFOvk8 I've only got two, maybe three Motown puns left in me…Four tops. “you look tired” yeah well the enemies didn’t become lovers until 3am My mom just called to tell me that if I still haven't received any job offers I should check my emails because maybe they emailed me Can't wait to get a facelift in my 50s and tell everyone the trick to aging gracefully is to drink a lot of water Taught my boss the short cuts for “select all” “copy” and “paste” and she looked at me like I split the atom https://t.co/i0Ks40njzi the internet is forever unless you wrote an article for a website in 2015 just got an ad for this jacket and was like omg so cute I want it….. It is for a baby. This is not the first time this has happened to me pic.twitter.com/FhN4QY68Bv In an alternate universe you’re being ignored in a room full of elephants. on a first date i will carve our initials into a tree it's the most romantic way to let you know i have a knife da congress https://t.co/rwEjIFXikv Was talking to a 15 year old at a show a few days ago and he jokingly called me an old man and when I said I was a woman instead of being transphobic he instantly switched to calling me grandma. Inclusively dunked on thank you woke child BILF (book I'd like to finish) Sorry I can’t I have generational laundry to do By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.
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