The ladies of the internet never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit.

Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up their hilarious musings. Scroll through this week’s great tweets, threads and other posts from women, and then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.

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If you're cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

academic conferences are crazy because it’s like Let’s go to the most beautiful place in the world and then look at powerpoints for 12 straight hours

I said no to a piece of cake today and have yet to see any health benefits

me: please print this thing for meprinter: absolutely not

I want to thank the Irish for inventing my favorite way to exit a function

what having a cat is like: pic.twitter.com/WP2u8vSsCq

guy on the middle seat of my redeye flight bravely asked me if i would move from my exit row window seat to a middle row seat 16 rows back so his friend could be with him. when i said no, he asked the aisle guy, who just laughed

It’s a shame men aren’t allowed in grocery stores https://t.co/c2sP6YCimk

Guy next to me at the bar last night watched me pull my beaded wallet out of my ruffley purse and instead of asking to buy me a drink said “Hi I noticed you like textures”

crazy how my advice for anyone who’s super online is to “go outside and touch grass” but then I meet an outdoorsy hiker type and im like “oh man, this weirdo needs a scroll sesh stat”

The kid next door (toddler age) is playing outside and just wiped out in his Fisher-Price car, and I just heard the babysitter say, "Oh no, your insurance premium is definitely going to go up!" And the kid who had only been mildly sniffling before made the most confused, but…

Sometimes I wonder how the Vaseline company is holding up, because one container basically last you for 70 years

also idk who controlling the weather but they got this bitch on shuffle

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